March For Our Lives

I was in 8th grade when the shooting at Columbine happened. I don't remember who told me or where I was. I don't remember if we talked about it at school the next day or if my parents talked about it. I don't remember if it was a topic of discussion in the hallways. I don't remember watching the coverage on the t.v. But I do remember the aftermath and how this incident, as isolated as it seemed, changed so much. There was just a general fear that a 13-year-old should not have to know... a fear that one of my fellow classmates one day might decide to do what Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold did on that day in April. I remember that trench coats were banned... as if that would really stop a similar event. A year or two later, I was in high school and I remember that a threat was called in and the entire school was evacuated. We sat on the bleachers around the football field while we waited for the "all clear." In addition to the lives they took that day in April, it was almost as if Dylan and Eric stripped away sort of innocence-- not just to myself as a 13-year-old, but possibly the the whole country. The fact that two people- two students no less- would bring guns into a school and shoot at and kill their fellow classmates was inconceivable.

In April 2007, I was walking back to my room after class at the University of Mary Washington when I heard murmurings about another mass shooting- this time at Virginia Tech. With a sense of fear and urgency, I rushed back to the room and quickly attempted to reach out my friends that attended that school. I finally heard from them that they were all okay. I read online news posts and watched the continuous footage on the TV. There were emails from the school and there were efforts to improve the school's ability to reach out to its students and faculty in an emergency situation. Either that afternoon or in the days that followed, I remember that students formed a single-file line all the way down the main walkway on campus and held hands during a moment of silence. Someone added coloring to the fountain to make it an orange color, one of VT's school colors. There was candle light vigil held on Ball Circle. This shooting caused such a sense of fear on campus and I remember going to class and thinking "any one of these people could do the same thing... will it happen here next? What would I do?"

Those are the two mass shootings that stick out most in my mind. But just like so many other people, over the next decade the shootings became more frequent and, unbelievably, they started to become something that no longer surprises us. Sure we think they are sad and horrible tragedies- but it is becoming not uncommon to hear that 12 people were killed at a movie theater in Colorado or that over 50 individuals were fatally shot at a concert in Las Vegas. Legally, nothing was done, despite attempts by survivors and family members of those killed at one of the many mass shootings that have occurred since 1999. In general, we had become desensitized.

Following a mass shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in February 2018- the student survivors took matters in their own hands. They created movement demanding modifications to the existing gun laws in an effort to protect not only children in schools, but really all people. My fear was always for myself- what if someone comes into this movie theater with a gun? What someone sneaks a gun into this store? But now my fear is for you. I am motivated to make a better country for you and am so touched by the other people that are working to tirelessly to do the same.  I don't want you to grow up with the same fears that I grew up with and continue to deal with...  I don't want mass shootings to be something that you become desensitized about. I don't want you to have to rush to figure out if one of your friends was caught in the line of fire. I don't want you to ever have to run from a public space to safety with your hands above your head. Most importantly, I don't want you to be another name added to the long list of people lost to mass shootings in this country. I don't want you to be another statistic.

That is why you, your dad, and I attended the March for our Lives event in Fredericksburg on Saturday, March 24, 2018. It was a small event but part of the larger March for our Lives protest put on in Washington, DC and over 800 localities throughout the country. Around 400 people stood at the intersection of Williams Street and Route 3 with their signs, flags, and orange ribbons. They held held up peace signs as cars honked  (mostly in supported) as they drove by. It is our hope that law makers will soon start to listen... how many more children, parents, students , teachers, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, friends, loved ones, humans have to die from a gun before they take action and make change?  I am so happy that we were able to go to that event in Fredericksburg. I hope that  when you are older this is an event that is marked as one that was the beginning of incredible change and that your generation looks back on this with pride. You were there, sweet baby. You were there as the youngest among the protesters surrounded by others that care more about people's lives than some antiquated right to carry a weapon.

Meeting Great Grandma Edith

Edie,

 On Saturday, March 3, when you were just over on week old, we took you to meet your Great Grandma Edith!  It was also your first long car ride, which we were very nervous about but you did great! All two hour to Waynesboro and two hours back! As of right now, you seem to not mind your car seat and you really like to ride in the car- it puts you right to sleep!  We stopped at Wendy's for a really quick lunch and then were off to Great Grandma's house on Alphin Avenue. When we arrived, your great aunts and uncles (Janet, Donald, Lloyd, Jane, and Bettie) and PopPop and Nana were there having a meeting about caring for Great Grandma. So we said a quick hello but then tried to quietly sneak by to let them finish their meeting. I guess Aunt Janet had been talking up your visit to Great Granma quite a bit because as we passed, she said "How's the baby doing?!" it was very cute!   After they finished the meeting, Uncle Donald came over and said hello to you and gave you a kiss on the forehead before he had to leave. Your aunts Bettie, Jane, and Janet all got a chance to hold you and then finally Great Grandma got her chance to meet you. She seemed very excited to see and hold you, Little Edith. 

It was a moment that I'd longed for even when you were just a wish.  Great Grandma was one of the first people to know about you- we took a picture of your 13-week ultrasound to her on August 19 and told her that we were expecting you and also asked if we could name you after her. It was a very special moment- as was this first meeting! 

We got got some pictures and then you were passed around between Aunt Janet, Nana, and PopPop.  Eventually both you and Great Grandma were asleep! :) A little later your Aunt Kathy and cousin Peyton stopped by to see you as well! It was a wonderful day and you got to meet so many people that are so important in our lives.  I know that it's something we all will remember for the rest of our lives.

Second Week

Edie,
 You just got through your second week!  It seems like you've been a part of our lives for a lit longer than two weeks and it's hard to believe how much has happened since February 23rd.. or even just this last week alone! Here are few notes on this last week!

• Your dad and I have started to establish what feels like a routine at night and you've started sleeping a bit longer at night although you seem to still have your nights and days a bit mixed up.
• You had your two week checkup with Dr. Bradshaw- you weighed 7lbs 10oz, were 20.5 inches long, and had a head circumference of 14 inches.  She seemed very pleased with your progress!
• Auntie Adriana and Uncle Luke (Moss) came to visit you! 
• You've started to focus on me and even follow my face, especially during feedings. 

First Week Memories

Edie,
 Your Dad and I just wanted to make a list of some of our memories from your first week with us! It's been a whirlwind with a huge learning curve but we wouldn't trade it for anything!

• The moment when Aaron put you on my chest right after you were born
• Nana was the first family member to step through the door after you were born- I remember her face when she walked through the door. It was one of complete joy and happiness! 
• Saturday- the day that we left the hospital... your dad and I sat around and waited for what felt like forever to be discharged but when the moment came we weren't prepared at all!  We checked in with just a few bags but we had SO MANY things when we left and we were scrambling around trying to get everything. I was wheeled out with you in your car seat (the nurse had to show us how to safely put you in there) and your dad had his arms full of all sorts of stuff.. including a bunch of balloons. I remember laughing so hard at him with those balloons as we left- I laughed even harder as the nurse and I waited inside and your dad walked outside the doors and those balloons whipped in the wind. I wanted nothing more than than to see him struggle to get those balloons in the car!

• We put you in the car and I sat in the back with you. You dad got in driver's seat and we took off.. we both said a wide variety of things including things like "are we really allowed to do this?" "What in the world did we do?" "I can't believe they let us leave...."...Your dad said that he was very nervous driving with you in the back seat!  Precious cargo!

• As we crested the hill and could see the house, we saw that PopPop was waiting outside for us. He must have called inside to Nana because she came running out as we pulled into the driveway. They were so excited to welcome you home! It is a very sweet memory.  Nana also took a picture of the three of us as we were walking to the house for the first time!

• When we burp you and you're still hungry, you open your mouth wide and flail your head around... your Dad and I call this "Zombie Baby"- it makes us laugh so hard! 
• Your pediatrician, Dr. Bradshaw, made time to see you on the Sunday after you were born. Your dad and I really appreciated that she was willing to see you- she answered so many of our questions and didn't rush us at all. You were born at 7lb 4 oz, you dropped to 6lb 12 oz when we left the hospital, and had gone down to 6lb 10 oz by this appt. 

• One of the sad moments after you were born was when I found out that I didn't have enough breastmilk to feed you. Those first days until I came the realization that you weren't getting enough to eat were very challenging- but when I made the hard decision to stop breastfeeding and go to a combination of formula and pumped breastmilk it was so devastating. In fact, as a write this it still breaks my heart. The first time someone other than your dad or I fed you with a bottle I couldn't watch. I left the room and had a good cry.  
• Because you weren't getting enough to eat, you didn't poop for over 48 hours. When we saw Dr. Bradshaw on the Tuesday after you were born, she suggested that if you didn't go by that evening to use a rectal thermometer to just get things moving. Your dad went around to several stores trying to find the right type of thermometer and ended up coming back with 3. That day had been stressful and our nerves were shot.. but around 9pm, your dad and I decided that it was time to do this.. even though we dreaded it. I went to your rock and play to pick you up and noticed that your onesie was brown... you had your first MASSIVE poop explosion and were covered in it from your midsection all the way down to your feet. It required insane team work but we got your clothes off, got you cleaned, and even gave you your first sponge bath! You really liked this bath and were SO calm! We wrapped you in a grey giraffe towel.We felt like we could take on the world after this! 

• We took you for your first walk in the stroller on Wednesday, February 28! We put you in a big puffy white penguin outfit and walked down Hoover Lane to the VCR trail. I still wasn't 100 percent so we didn't walk very far on the trail- but it was good to get out!

• It has been interesting to watch the Hera and Pepper start to figure out this new situation! Although neither one of them were thrilled at first, Hera was actually the first to start to warm up to you. She would come and check you out- while Pepper was terrified every time you made a noise or moved! I think she thought you would eat her food! ;-) She has started to come around a little bit and is willing to be in the same room as you!

• Other random memories: in your first week you really loved to suck your fingers and in those first few days you made the FUNNIEST noise when you sucked on them!; how fuzzy your hair gets after we bathe you!; how wonderful it is that you like to sleep on our chests <3